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This Week In The Internet – The Evil Harry Potter Edition

“This week in the internet” – Where The Sofa shares some of the random things he’s come across in Christian Internet this week…

Is Benny Hinn Abandoning the Prosperity Gospel?

Well it seems that Benny Hinn… One of the kings of Prosperity Gospel, is now saying the “The Gospel is not for sale”…

Did you hear that Harry Potter is still evil?

St. Edward Catholic School in Nashville has said No to Harry Potter due to it containing “actual curses and spells”. From CBSNews.com

A Catholic school in Nashville, Tennessee has banned the “Harry Potter” series because a reverend at the school claims the books include both good and evil magic, as well as spells, which, if read by a human can conjure “evil spirits,” according to the Tennessean.

The publication obtained an email from Rev. Dan Reehil, a pastor at Saint Edwards Catholic School parish, which was sent to parents. In the email, Reehil explains in the email that he has consulted several exorcists in the U.S. and Rome, and it was recommended that the school remove the books, the Tennessean reports.

“These books present magic as both good and evil, which is not true, but in fact a clever deception,” Rev. Reehil said of the seven-part “Harry Potter” book series. “The curses and spells used in the books are actual curses and spells; which when read by a human being risk conjuring evil spirits into the presence of the person reading the text,” the email continues.

CBS News

Something to listen to this week…

“After an epic summer, Martin and Rachel reflect on the end of the Soul Survivor summer festivals and the impact they’ve had on young people.”

I’d recommend giving the Youthscape reflection on the “end of soul survivor” festivals a listen – check it out on the Youthscape website.

Tweet of the Week

Best moment I’ve seen on Twitter this week, could well* be…

Thank you Twitter Jesus for clearing that up.

*I’m ignoring the Brexit related comments on Twitter. For everyones sake.

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Alternative Activities During A Christian Festival

Christian festivals are great. Loads of stuff happening, from great speakers, and great people, to great bands, and tolerable food.

Loads of stuff happening, all the time. But what if you’re someone whose attention gets distracted at the best of times.

What if you find yourself wanting something a little different to do?* Here are ten ideas of alternative activities that can be done at a Christian festival.

  1. Say “Amen” with every point that the speaker makes. Get gradually louder as the talk progresses. Encourage others around you to join. See how loud you can all get. **
  2. If attending any Soul Survivor festival, dress like your attending a funeral. All week. And everytime some says “Soul Survivor”, you whisper”Long may it Rest in Peace”.
  3. Are you attending Creation Fest? Set up a stall saying, “Cream First. Change my mind”
  4. Facebook friend EVERYONE YOU MEET!!! Show you’re an awesome Christian by tagging them in inspirational Bible verse images.
    Once an hour.
    Every hour.
  5. See anyone eating bread? Offer them a glass of red wine. So they can eat like Jesus ate.***
  6. Start a rumour that the rumour about Delirious having a reunion show at the festival is simply a rumour. See what happens.
  7. If stuck in a heatwave. Play “Rain Down” really loudly, on an old guitar. Explain that you’re praying for the rain to come.
  8. See anyone drinking wine? Ask if you can share their communion.
  9. Live stream your whole festival experience on Facebook Live. ALL of it. Let me know what happens.
  10. Apologise for the late night guitar playing, by serving really strong decaff coffee every morning to the tents around you. Serve proper stuff in the evenings.

Any more you think that should be added?

* Please be careful. The Church Sofa takes no responsibility if you end up in Christian festival jail… or actual jail… or where ever…
**Be careful. This may lead to accidental reports of Revival breaking out. Due to you messing around.
On second thoughts. That could be quite funny.
*** MIght get expensive.

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Soul Survivor. Good Bye.

Soul-Survivor-Closing

Mike Pilavachi from Soul Survivor, has announced, the Soul Survivor Festivals are to close.

There’s a text version of the above found at the Soul Survivor website, which includes a snippet which I’m sure I remember from my Soul Survivor Days. (20 – ish years ago)

“we know that God said, ‘I will build my church’ – he never said, ‘I will build my Soul Survivor’. Our passion has always been to support the local church where faith is lived out as family week in and week out, not to create our own movement.”

I can’t help but think that closing 5 (I think), festivals really shows this.

There was a temptation to say something rude / sarcastic / silly…something a bit “Church Sofa” about all this.

I can’t.

For all the Live CDs, the festivals, books, Delirious / Tree / Sarah Mason gigs.

For that silly Bible365 thing we did on The Sofa.

For the interestingly quiet queues for the shower (during the alter calls).

I guess.

Thank you.

(In case you need something more silly to read, can I suggested “Spreading Joy At A Christian Festival“, and the related posts – they are possibly inspired in some way by Soul Survivor. Possibly.)

 

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Spreading Joy at A Christian Festival

Sofa may receive some some money (not much) if you click on some of the links below…

Over the next month and a bit there will be loads of Christian Festivals all around England, which will attract many Christians from many different Churches from all over the place. With festivals such as Momentum, New Wine, Soul Survivor, Keswick, Greenbelt. and Creation Fest, there are plenty to choose from.

In an attempt to get into the Festival spirit, Sofa decided to write the annual Church Sofa list of the best ways to create trouble at a Christian Festival ask around for ways to spread some “Joy” at these events…

  1. Have a supply of sweets to give out to people.
  2. Be servant hearted. Serve warm milky hot chocolate each night of the festival to the tents around you. On the last night, mix it up with espresso.
  3. Walk up to any musicians / famous Christian singer types and ask if they are U2.
  4. Print a T-Shirt saying “Its not like it used to be around here”.
  5. Walk around with an open wifi hotspot in your pocket. Lock it down so people can only access another festival website.
  6. Lead late night worship sessions. Ensure the worship is honest, by not tuning your guitar… not singing in tune… Also ensure that God can hear by singing loudly.
  7. Ask people if they’ve heard of the Delirious reunion tour, and their “Holy Troublemakers” single*?
  8. Ask everyone for their signature, explain they are all famous in Gods eyes. (Don’t ask famous Christians for their autograph)
  9. Tweet a photo of random peoples signatures to @thechurchsofa. Help me feel included in with the fun.
  10. Be servant hearted. Serve coffee each morning of the festival. Ensure it’s decaf on the last morning.

For more ideas, please check out last years list, Managing Mischief At A Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

*i may have made this up, but there is a song on Stu G’s “The Beatitudes Project” called Holy Troublemakers, which could be mistaken for a reunion.

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10 Ways To Manage Mischief At A Christian Festival

10 Ways To Manage Mischief At A Christian Festival

Well with New Wine, Soul Survivor, and Keswick currently taking place, its fair to say we are well into the Summer Christian Festival season. With Festivals like Greenbelt, Momentum, and Creation Fest, there are still plenty to choose from.

As its the Summer Christian Festival Season, it is also time for the annual Church Sofa list of the best ways to create trouble at a Christian Festival… Consider this list in case you get bored or something…

  1. Is it raining? Throw mud on strangers eyes. Explain you’re curing their spiritual blindness.
  2. Arrange for the portable showers to be moved around the site. Take advantage of confusing everyone, by having no queue for your shower.
  3. Walk around the camp site with a sign offering free hugs. Run away from anyone who comes anywhere near you.
  4. Throw water on to people. Shout that its Holy Water – check if your victim if the water is burning.
  5. Late night choir practice.
  6. Walk around the camp site offering a free tent to anyone who has had problems with their tent in the rain. Dont tell people its just one tent, that is shared between anyone who takes you up on your offer. Obviously this should be a two person tent.
  7. Is your festival at a Holiday Camp like Butlins? Make the most of the worship time to sneak to the gambling machines without the guilt of being seen…. If on a camp site, get yourself to the showers.
  8. Walk around with a huge sign offering to judge people for free. I’m curious to see what will happen.
  9. Is the worship leader encouraging you to lift your hands in the air? Sit down instead.
  10. Start a rumor that The World Wide Message Tribe aren’t really coming back together.
  11. Campers near you have bar-b-qs, and other cooking equipment? “Borrow” any and all fire lighting equipment, and then challenge them to pray for fire from heaven.

Any that you would like to add?

For more ideas, please check out last years list, How to misbehave at a Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

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How to misbehave at a Christian Festival

Well its not just approaching the end of July, its also approaching Christian Festival season. With Festivals like Greenbelt, Momentum, Soul Survivor, Creation Fest, there are plenty to choose from. Many of these are great amazing times, and I doubt you’ll get bored at any of them, but you might. If you do, maybe you’ll find some inspiration here for the best way to misbehave at a Christian Festival

  1. Not at all charismatic? Surrounded by very charismatic worshippers? Feel out of place? Offer tea and refreshments to those around you. Obviously ask people to put their hands down if they want any drink.
  2. Start a rumor that Delirious aren’t really coming back together.
  3. Set up a mobile wifi hotspot, with no password. Call the network “Free WiFi For All”. Block access to Facebook and Twitter over it.
  4. Set up a toilet cubical, with big signs so that everyone knows its a toilet cubical. Forget to include the toilet.
  5. Do you snore? Position a megaphone inside your tent, so your snoring sounds are picked up by the megaphone. If people complain, explain how it’s been a problem all your life. Ask for prayer.
  6. Advertise a pop up pub that will appear on the last night of the festival, ensure the advertising mentions the words “Cheap” and “Beer” over and over. Set up a pop up pub, sell beer, dont mention its alcohol free…
  7. Encourage “serventhood” at the festival, by offering free coffees to people around your tent, as the week goes on increase the strength of the coffee. On the last day, switch to decaf.
  8. Dance like David danced during the worship. With the same amount of clothes…
  9. Have a stand up offering to baptise people. When people come to be baptised, use your super soaker to baptise them. Include red food colouring, when they look at you oddly, explain they’ve been baptised in the blood of the lamb.**
  10. Set up a game of laser quest. In and among people during a worship service. Something like this.

* There are loads more obviously, but I’m not going to list them all. Someone just has to be left out at somepoint.

**if you have the money, you could just use lambs blood.***

*** give this a really long think before you do this. It is kinda gross.

Any more suggestions?

For more ideas, check out last years list: Ten Ways to Misbehave at a Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

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Ten Ways to Misbehave at a Christian Festival

Still due to go to a Christian Festival this year? Maybe Momentum? Greenbelt? I doubt you will get bored, but you might. If you do, maybe you’ll find some inspiration here for the best way to misbehave at a Christian Festival *:

  1. Play basketball in inappropriate places. Like the Market Place.
  2. Bring old wine to New Wine.
  3. Run round Soul Survivor in late 90s clothing. Ask people when The World Wide Message Tribe are playing.
  4. Hang an out of order sign on a shower cubicle. Watch peoples faces as you walk past the shower queue into your waiting shower the next morning.
  5. Going to New Day? Ask which day of the festival is THE new day.
  6. Go to Soul Survivor dressed up ready for a game of paint ball. Spend the week going up to people asking if they fancy a game of “Sole Survivor”
  7. Camp site + acoustic guitar – tune + late at night = you.
  8. Going to Greenbelt? Dress up as a ninja… Spend the whole time asking people if they are THE Greenbelt. If they say yes, call them master and do anything they say.
  9. Pick up a cheap alarm clock. Set it to go really early. Leave it outside the guitar players tent.
  10. Get a crowd organised, and have an early morning worship gathering among the other tents. Have a few people cooking up some bacon ready to offer a bacon sarnie to any one the comes out their tent looking annoyed. Count the amount of people that stay annoyed at the wake up call, verses the amount of people who act blessed by the bacon. If there are more “blessed people”… try it again the next morning.

Please let us know if you try any of these!

Any more you’d suggest?

*Obviously any of this may really annoy people. Be careful of your audience. Play nice. We accept no responsibility if you get hit!

 

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Bible in One Year – Week One #Bible365

Dusty-Bible

Dusty-BibleSo it all starts today we’re looking forward to the challenge and seeing what God might do over the next year as we try to read the whole Bible in just one year. If you don’t remember or didn’t see that’s what we’re doing have a look here if you want to know more.

It’s time to dust off that Bible, or get out your Soul Survivor Bible in One Year (if you have one) that we’re going to be following and start reading.

We wish you all the best with this, please share  any thoughts or reflections you have on what we read this week leave a comment below or send us an email) as we really hope this can be a journey that we go on together and can learn form each other as we do this. Continue reading “Bible in One Year – Week One #Bible365”