Don’t Listen To This*…

Do you ever find yourself in moments of quiet?
Possibly a moment of quiet during a funeral?
Possibly a time of silence during a church worship service?
Or maybe even when a prayer meeting gets a little deep?

If this is the case, don’t listen to this song.

And what ever you do, dont listen to the lyrics.

You may catch yourself smiling during a prayer meeting if you do**

Or might just be me.?

Do you get any random yet innocent tunes pop into your head at the worst times? Please share!

*An Alternative name for this post is “An insight into Andys mind”

** Not that smiling during a prayer meeting is bad… it may just look odd if at the wrong time.

How To Be An Efficient Pastor

For some people, being a Church Pastor isn’t a job, its a calling on your life. Its a calling that can take up a lot of your time, and place strains on different areas of your life, as you seek to work out what your priorities are.

I’m not going to tell Church Pastors what their priorities should be, but I here are a list of ways I’ve been told that pastors can be truly efficient in how they serve the Lord, and their congregation.

1. Get to Church. Do the sermon. Leave during the last hymn.
2. Have standard emails you can copy and paste to people who get in touch with pastoral needs.
3. If male, don’t waste time with mums groups.
4. If female, don’t waste time with men’s breakfasts.
5. Finish any meetings dead on time. No matter how far into the agenda.
6. Ensure you are not well known for returning voice mails.
7. Allocate pastoral visits to your pastoral visit team. Ensure you are never on this team.
8. Got an invitation to lead an assembly at the local school? Save time by asking your youth worker to do it. After all the youth worker needs the experience.
9. Keep a copy of your sermon scripts. Once you’ve preached for three years, start again from year one. Its ok, no one would be able to remember all of them over the last three years.
10. Do you need to lead a prayer meeting? Explain to people that it will be a time of personal, reflective, silence. For the entire meeting.

If all else fails, buy this guy from Amazon to do some work for you: