How To Do Church This Week

woman having a video call

Its a weekend in Lockdown. For many of us weekends include Church on the Sunday. During a pandemic, the act of going to a church building is far more complicated then ever.

Therefore may I present the Church Sofa List of Ways To Do Church during 2021:

  1. Put it on YouTube.
  2. Put it on YouTube, join in with the comments.
  3. Arrange to watch an online service at the same time as other Christians. Perhaps chat on WhatsApp at the same time.
  4. All gather via on Zoom, chat, pray, read a bible verse, talk about that bible verse.
  5. Give the national C of E “Daily Hope” number a call – 0800 804 8044
  6. Ask if you local church has a number to dial into.
  7. Give someone a call / drop them a message to say hi.
  8. Watch it on Facebook Live, join in with comments, share the video onto your feed?
  9. Live near someone from Church? How about dropping a card / chocolate / cake around?

Any other ideas?

The Optimistic Christian Book of the Year?

Are you an optimistic?

Do you feel there are better days ahead?

Are you a Christian?

I may have stumbled over the optimistically Christian part of Amazon. (Affliate link)

The 2021 planners. Looking a bit a like this…

Including inspirational quotes, and Christian holidays noted. Get it from Amazon (affiliate link)

Not that I’m saying that any plans for 2021 is overly optimistic, but I do feel more hope for stuff happening in 2022….

Alternative Christmas Talks

hand metal music musician

It’s Christmas time, and let’s face it. Online or not online there are many many sermons out there to be be given. And in some cases, there are Christmas sermons still to be written. If you are looking for Christmas sermon inspiration, here are our list of Alternative Christmas Talks that SOMEONE needs to give…

  1. Mary, Joseph and Family Bubbles.
  2. The Shepherds and Social Distancing.
  3. The Angels. Why they sang facing away form each other.
  4. Worship without singing: The Stable Boy.
  5. Safer outside. The nativity as a Covid safe model.
  6. Masks: Lets embrace wearing real ones in church.
  7. Are we socially distanced from Jesus?
  8. Trust: King Herod, Boris, and Jesus.
  9. Would Angels wear masks?
  10. Don’t be afraid. I bring good news: Vaccines, hope, Jesus.

Any more ideas?

Church Online: A personal highlight

While having the church livestream on…

Guy leading prayers online: “…you might want to pause in the quietness…

Home: *The lounge echoes with sounds of the globe being smacked by a lightsaber… moments before said globe is kicked into the Christmas tree.*

Christmas 2020.

Are you ready for this?

How To Have A Christmas Carol Service At Home

white bauble on christmas tree

Its Christmas! (I’m allowed to say that now right?)

Its 2020. Its been a weird year, and lets face it. This Christmas is going to be a little different to the normal. (Sorry – we’re probably gonna get a bit bored of saying “its all a bit different this year”)

As part of this “little different” Christmas, along with everything else, Christmas Carol services are going online.

So. What do you do at home to replicate that Christmas Carol Service feel?

Here are a few ideas…

  1. Probably some sort of internet connection – or phone line.
  2. Turn off the lights.
  3. A Nativity dress up costume, or Santa.
  4. Have access to Youtube, Facebook, or something to watch the church carol service online.
  5. Get Candles lit
  6. Get more Candles lit
  7. Mulled Wine. No, more than that.
  8. Have some sort of advent crown thing. Possibly with candles. Possibly with dry plant attached.
  9. Take bets on how long it will be before someone, somewhere has “issues” with the amount of lit candles.
  10. Have a fire extinguisher on stand by.

Anything I’ve missed?

Dress up for Christmas, AND SOCIAL DISTANCE!

Its Christmas time! (Tell me you’ve noticed)

Its a time of Christmas jumpers, Christmas shopping, and dressing up in all things… Christmas like?

Its also 2020, so its probably wise to ensure you’re keeping your distance from… everyone.

This could be your chance to have the best of both worlds.

Dress up as a Shepherd for Christmas, and have your own shepherds hook! (Affliate link)

Pick it up from Amazon, and social distance whilst playing a much loved nativity character!

Online Christmas Carol Service Bingo

We would normally be entering the world of Christmas Carol Services in Churches around the world right now. While some churches may be hosting “something”, lets face it – the church isn’t going to be packed this year.

Normally, I sit there and wonder about how familiar they feel, and out of that feeling – the Christmas Carol Service Bingo Card were born…

While, as everything is a “little different” this year – this years bingo cards are also a little different.

Feel free to print them out and play bingo in your kitchen / on the sofa / back row / shed / bus / bed / supermarket queue in a carpark / where ever church looks like these days…

Obviously don’t shout AMEN if you complete a line, shout HARK! or something… You can say that as loud as you want this year. Unless you actually are in a bus, or a supermarket queue or something.

That might be strange.

The Christian T Shirt of The Week

Remember back in the day, DC Talk kinda tried to claim the term “Jesus Freak”? I wonder if the same sort of thought process took place here?

Welcome to the Jesus Christ Super Spreader T Shirt

Made after the guy that is hosting massive outdoor worship events in America was called a Super Spreader by Rolling Stone Magazine. Events that look a bit like this…

Sofa is not sure if being a super spreader is something to be proud of.

And yes. Perhaps he is trying to say he is “spreading the name of Jesus”? Now is not the time to try and claim that term.

Plus. Lets face it. There is a risk that events like this could well spread covid, and that, is probably not something to be proud of.

Maybe, being an idiot isn’t something to be proud of?

Alternative – Socially Distanced – Christmas Service Ideas

Once upon a time. In a simpler pre-covid age, Sofa wrote a little thing about Alternative Christmas Service Ideas, and as a post. Its fine. You can argue some of it could be adjusted for a socially distanced church service, but… some of them might take work.

With that in mind, may I present* the Church Sofa…

Alternative – Socially Distanced – Christmas Service Ideas…

  1. Ok. Lets face it. Inviting a group of people anywhere may not be the best the thing to do right now. So – lets bring it to the people. Find a heavily pregnant lady and ask her to walk around the local streets. Knocking on peoples door, asking if theres any room in the inn.
  2. Add a hassled husband into the mix.
  3. Have a live donkey with them as well. Don’t forget to walk the long donkey up to the house whilst they are being asked if there is any room. Bonus points if the donkey leaves any “bonus” gifts on the door step. It will add to the atmosphere.
  4. Have a socially distanced choir follow the couple and donkey.
  5. Livestream a Christmas reading. Just outside the open window to a labour ward. See if any “bonus sounds” get picked up.
  6. Live stream a reading of the shepherds, in the light of a camp fire. Possibly on the church carpert. Granted someone on the PCC / a Deacon / Church Wardens, may come after you, but the young people will love it. Besides. It might be a while until anyone notices.
  7. Do you normally have a midnight service? Try and have drop a little bottle of port around everyones houses. See if anyone has it by the time the service starts.
  8. Is there anyone pregnant in your church? Get them to change their Facebook name to “Mary”, then a few days before encourage her say she has to go on a journey… and the travel arrangements aren’t great.
  9. Raise money for Sofa to make the Christmas Carol Service Bingo Card – an app. Therefore cutting down on paper being given out to people.
  10. Its Christmas. Its not cancelled! Its a time of celebration! Live stream fireworks being set off! Just dont have the donkey involved with it.

*Some of this might actually get you arrested, or result in a fire or something… The Sofa doesn’t take any responsibility – for anything – let alone the internet getting into trouble.

Are there any you would add?