How Christians Spend The Extra Hour

Surprise! We have another hour of 2020 to live through. With the clocks going back we all have the gift of time, so, what are we going to do with that gift?

What are you going to do with that extra hour? Here are a few Christian responses to the clock change.

  1. Think about praying and reading the Bible.
  2. Make that bacon sandwich you’ve been meaning to make before church actually starts.
  3. Work on that outside chapel you’ve been planning.
  4. Go for a run. (Just kidding.)
  5. Scroll through Facebook. Plan to pray for the people you see.
  6. Read a book about how to manage your time well.
  7. Realise that the Bible talks about rest in a positive way, and stay in bed. (To those parents out there, I’m sorry).
  8. Drink coffee, stare into space whilst contemplating life. For an hour. Rock back and forth a little.
  9. Rock up early to in person church, when quizzed, reassure people that you are just more Holy then them. (Don’t do this if you’re joining on line. Just. Don’t)
  10. Eat a mince pie for Breakfast. Tweet about it.
  11. Hide in bed. Write a silly blog post. (That, with an ounce of planning, would have meant said blog post would have been released on Friday).

What would you add?

Autocorrected Hymns

Autocorrected Church Hymns. When Church Hymns meet Autocorrect

Imagine, somewhere out there, someone is typing up some hymns to be sung at Church. The Sofa family once used Microsoft Publisher for this, and occasionally… mistakes were made. (Don’t worry, someone in the church family lovingly pointed it out)

What if, someone typed up church songs and hymns, while depending on autocorrect?What would autocorrected church hymns look like? (Or at least the chorus anyway…)

Amazing Grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wrench like me
I once was lost but now am found
Was blind but now I see

O lord my god
When I in awesome wonderful
Consider all the people they’re hands have made
I see the attached
I hear the rolling thunder
They’re power throughout the universal displayed

Holler holler holler
lord god almighty
Early in the morning our song shall raise to thee
Holler holler holler
Mercifully and mighty
God in three persons,
Blessings trinity

Blessings for the lord
Oh my days oh my gosh
Worship his holy Bible
Sing like never beforehand, o my soul
I’ll worship your holy name

Yesterday, today’s, and foreign?
You are the same, you never change,
Yesterday, today’s, and foreign?
You are faithful, cor well trusting you.

Be thought my vision
O lord of my hearts
Naughty be all else to me, save that thou artist
Thought my best though by day or by nights
Waking it sleeping
Thy presences my Lightyear

With thanks to unlocking the bible for hosting plenty of lyrics.

Should I go to that Church Thing? (The September update)

Back when this Covid thing first started, Sofa tried to be helpful, and created a flowchart for people to follow to help decide if they should go to a church thing or not. (This was back when Church things were a… thing*).

So… I figured I would try an “updated version”.

It may have ran out of my control a little bit…

*For whats its worth, a lot of others things were also a “thing” back then! (EG. Pints inside, eating out… and warm…, questionable hand hygiene etc)

What Has The Church Been Up To?

If you’re somewhere on Christian Twitter, you may well have seen this…

To say that Sofa disagree’s with the spirit of the above, is putting it mildly, so, in the spirit of The Sofa, here is The Church Sofa list of what the Church has been up to during Lockdown?

  1. Working with new partners to give out food parcels.
  2. Giving out food parcels to retirement homes in the community.
  3. Foodbanks.
  4. Online worship.
  5. Online prayer meetings.
  6. Setting up sermons via phones.
  7. Dropping sermon DVDs to people.
  8. Supporting the bereaved.
  9. Running services on local BBC radio.

Thats at the top of my head.

Please feel free to add something either you’ve been involved with / heard about / your church has been doing below!

Zoom Church this week?

One of the great things I’ve found of 2020 is the different approaches people are taking to Church online, be it broadcasting on Youtube, Facebook Live shows, or Zoom meetings…

Those who do Church services on Zoom. Do they look anything like this?

Church Fashion: The 2020 Collection

Well, for Church this week. Can Sofa suggest something appropriate?

Something, you know, that points to Jesus, and suitable for where you are.

Something like this?

Yes. They are pyjamas. Has anyone worn anything else for the last 7 weeks?

Find it at CafePress.

Note about this morning.

Just a reminder,

It’s ok if you over slept.

It’s ok if you ran around before Church.

It’s if you were late.

Also a reminder

It’s not ok if you went to a Church Gathering, that’s not social distancing. It’s also not loving your neighbour.

It’s also not ok if you switched the video chat on before you’d finished getting dressed for Church.