What Do Christians Do When Bored

Being A Bored Christian

Sometimes. When inspiration leaves us. Boredom strikes.  Yes, just like everyone else. Christians get bored. And not just during sermons.

Possibly during a period of illness, its not unusual to feel bored at times. At one point, (not when bored), Sofa did some research into what happens when Christians are bored.

Here is the Church Sofa list of 10 Things Christians Do When Bored*.

  1. Read all the bible plans on YouVersion.
  2. Build forts with leftover paper Bible studies.
  3. Artistically write Bible verses on sheets of paper.
  4. Email all the missionaries, (and any other random people associated with their church), to encourage and ask for prayer requests.
  5. Redecorate the local church office.
  6. Ponder / pray / day dream about what vulnerable people you could volunteer to work with… Never get round to asking for information from the right places.
  7. Turn on God TV*
  8. Download ALL THE SERMONS, from your church website. Email the preachers your personal critique.
  9. Actually sit down and write some new material for their Church blog.
  10. Turn off God TV*.

Have you got any to add?

*With apologies to God TV.

When Greggs Does Christmas Advent Calendars…

greggs-christmas-sausage-roll

It seems that everyone likes doing an Advent Calendar at the moment. Advent Calendars aren’t just about chocolate and Lego*, but they are also now about Zoella and Greggs. While Zoella has had bad press about the price of her advent calendar, it is how Greggs have chosen to advertise their advent calendar that have got Christians upset.

According to The Guardian:

The bakery chain Greggs has apologised for offending Christians with a nativity scene advert that replaces Jesus with a sausage roll.

The chief executive of the Freedom Association, a rightwing pressure group, claimed the advert was “sick” and that the retailer would “never dare” insult other religions.

The UK Evangelical Alliance strongly criticised the baker, saying it was a gimmick that seemed to be about “manufacturing a scandal to sell baked goods”.

Greggs released the image to promote its £24 advent calendar, which goes on sale next Monday. Its decision to use an image depicting the three wise men gathering round a crib containing a sausage roll sparked criticism from Twitter users and religious groups.

Greggs is not withdrawing the product – its first ever advent calendar – but said in a statement: “We’re really sorry to have caused any offence, this was never our intention.”

Read More here.

Twitter. Has made a few comments, and they’re probably a more entertaining read then the news articles about this…

Do Christians need more of a sense of humor? 

I really want to write something here that talks about it being a massive publicity stunt, designed to wind people enough to get people talking about Greggs, while also being self aware that is exactly what I am doing. I just don’t know how to phrase it…

Either way, remember. If you do want to get angry about anything over this Christmas Season, please check out the “Burn The Heathens” Checklist.

Or maybe,

We should all choose a bit more carefully, what we all get angry about?

*I know. Advent calendars are also about Jesus.

Not sausage rolls.

Christian Halloween Costumes

We’re now well into October. Its nearly Christmas! Well, before its Christmas we first have Halloween. A time of year where (it seems that) mostly children walk around streets asking strangers for sweets, while dressed in mostly silly costumes.

How should a Christian react to Halloween? Well speaking from a costume prospective, we have a number of ideas of what costumes Christians should wear while opening their doors on Halloween.

Be a Monk!

Open the door, and pretend to be a monk. Bonus points for Monty Python impressions…

monk-costume

Available from amazon.

Dress like a Disciple

Yes I know that to be a Christian is to be a Disciple… but you could answer the door (or indeed go trick or treating) as an actual disciple…

discple-costume

Amazon Link.

You Can be Jesus!

Picture it, someone knocks on your door – it opens to the sight of plenty of white light, loud choral music, and you dressed like this…

jesus-costume
Available from Amazon

Or alternatively… imagine turning up at a neighbor’s house dressed as Jesus, surrounded by lots of little Jesus’s…

jesus-child-costume
Available from Amazon

You could always break out the flamethrowers, and get dressed up as this guy?*

devil-costume
Available from Amazon

*Remember kids. Dont play with fire.

Any other ideas?

Church Notice Board of The Week

Honest Church Notice Board

I’m not sure how long I’ve been posting Church Boards, but I know this is the first time I’ve purposely repeated one, twice in two weeks.

There’s just something about this one…

Maybe its a reminder for myself.

It might be a reminder for everyone to behave after the result of the EU Referendum.

Maybe its something about how some corners of the internet have reacted to the shootings in Orlando.

Possibly its something about the murder of the MP Jo Cox.

It could be something about my general feeling about the state of the world, and my lack of action in the face of it all.

Not sure what it is.

But this felt worthwhile repeating.

God and Guns: Why I am Not a Pacifist: Kill Your Attackers in Christian…

An interesting looking read available from Amazon.co.uk. Here’s at least the first part of the description:

Pacifism is a rapidly growing weakness in the Body of Christ today. Hardly anything pleases Satan more. Pacifism systematically weakens the church, culling believers out of the world early, and reducing the number of Christians on earth. Today’s churches often have women teaching men and it’s not the women’s fault. It’s because men are no longer leaders. Men are no longer Godly. Men no longer read Scripture. Men no longer do the job that God ordained them to do. Nowhere is that lack of leadership more insidious than when a weak, pacifist Christian male says he will step in front of his wife if a rapist and murderer ever tries to attack her and instead of mounting a physical defense, he will quote Bible verses. The response of a Godly woman to that would be, “I’d rather be defended than be second in line to a murder.” * A Godly man stops violence. An unGodly pacifist prolongs it. * A Godly man protects his little baby from physical harm. An unGodly pacifist would never lift a finger because it’s much easier and safer to be pious than to be a father and risk injury. * A Godly man knows that self-defense is not violence but it might have to be violent. An unGodly pacifist is never happier than when Bible verses are quoted while the innocent are maimed. Does “turn the other cheek” mean what the pacifist (and many Pastors today) say it means? Does it mean we are not to lift a finger to stop the innocent from being harmed? What does God really say about self-defense? What did God have to say to Jesus’ disciples who were packing weapons? (“Go get a few more.”) Sitting in a nice church building all fat and happy makes it easy to sit back and adopt a touchy-feely, girly, phony Biblical pacifist worldview in males. God has other things to say. There is a spiritual battle going on all around us both in the Heavenlies and on earth. The entire Bible is a battle manual.

The rest of the description… and the book itself (including the free Kindle version) is available from Amazon.co.uk.