Christian Apps, That Must Exist!

Apple used to run an advert for the iPhone, where the line “there’s an app for that”, was used on a regular basis. Well I have a question, is there an app for many parts of the Christian life? Sofa has conducted some extensive research in local churches, and here are 10 Christian apps that people want to exist.*

  1. Self Reading Bible Study. At a prearranged time, your phone will read a Bible passage aloud. No matter if you are in the area or not.
  2. A Pay To Pray Candle. Pay 79p, and a candle will flicker on your screen for 10 minutes. (With thanks to @PashaReflection on Twitter)
  3. Inspirational Video Finder. An app that will present you with randomised inspirational online videos. The ability to press stop is an in app purchase.
  4. The Facebook Prayer Machine. This is an app that will auto log into your Facebook account, and automatically click Like on anything that asks your to click Like if you love Jesus.
  5. Build your own Sermon. Answer a few questions, and this app will auto generate the perfect sermon for you. Sermons under 55 minutes require an in app purchase.
  6. WWJD. Stuck about the right thing to do in life? Ask your phone a question about it. It will tell you What Would Jesus Do, in that situation. (Actually… since I’ve typed this I’ve found that there it seems there is a What Would Jesus Do App)
  7. Preaching Phone. Choose your subject, the app will preach at you about it.
  8. Jesus Beard Generator.  Take a photo of someones face, this app will automatically add a “Jesus Beard” to that persons face.
  9. Dodgy Bible Verse Of The Day. At the most inappropriate moment of the day, your phone will automatically read a inappropriate Bible verse. Probably from Song of Songs. Probably loudly.
  10. Auto tither. Give this app your bank account details. Everyday, your bank account will go down by 10%.

*I lied, there has been no research into this article.