How Christians Can Deal With A Traffic Jam

Unless you either avoid road transport, or only travel over night, there’s a chance you’ve found yourself in a traffic jam.

If you’ve gone anywhere during a bank holiday weekend in Devon or Cornwall, theres a chance you’re still in one.

So how should a Christian life relate to being stuck in a traffic jam?

Here are a few ideas*:

1. Before you leave, proudly put up your “Bless off” bumper sticker. (With thanks to Midfaith crises for the idea)
2. Put the windows down. Get that Christian music on LOUD.
3. When the cars come to a stop, take a walk amongst the cars, putting your emergency stash of gospel tracts into peoples open windows. Trust in God that you’re not going to get ran over.
4. Point at the person in the car next to you. Pray in tongues. Loudly. While pointing at them. With your eyes open. Wide.
5. Grab your emergency wireless mic, tune in your car radio, turn it up, stand on the stage (your cars roof), and proudly share your testimony.
6. Take out your acoustic guitar, sing praise music while walking up and down the the traffic jam.
7. Send bluetooth messages to nearby phones, offering prayer and Christian counselling to all who request it.
8. Take out your wine and sandwiches, start a communion amongst your car and the cars around you. Change the subject if anyone talks about drinking and driving.
9. Shout that traffic jams violate your Christian rights (because Jesus wasn’t in one), and that you should be allowed to get through.

Any others?

*I also don’t recommend doing any of these. Mostly because you might die.