Have Jesus Hanging Around Your House

Ever wished you could speak to Jesus face to face?

Do you wish the Son of God could be around for dinner?

Do you have an inflatable collection of characters thats missing a certain something?

How about the Inflatable Jesus?


The weird thing is, I’m almost tempted to buy this…

Available from amazon.co.uk

10 Tips For Playing The Keyboard in Worship

The Sofa is pleased to share this guest blog from Kate from Londonwithatoddler.com. Kate describes herself as a “mother, writer, thinker. Granted, the kind of things I think about are along the lines of “What’s that smell?” or “Where can I buy chocolate around here?”, so maybe not that much of a thinker.  But I am definitely the first two”. Here she’s sharing her top ten tips for playing the keyboard in worship in Church.

Ten Tips for Playing the Keyboard in Worship

Like the church, the worship band is a body. And if the worship leader is the head, then the keyboard player is the liver – solid, always there and not really noticed until it goes wrong. But there is a lot of joy to be had sitting at the back, playing along, occasionally slipping the melody from “Let it Go” into poignant moments. And with our Ten Tips for Keyboard Players, we’re going to teach you how to be the best liver you can possibly be.

1. Know your place

As I might have mentioned, keyboard players are a bit of a supporting role, in secular bands as well as worship bands. For every Jean Michel Jarre, there’s a dozen session musicians. Bands may recruit a keyboard player for their tours, but they never make it onto the album cover.

In worship, the keyboard is normally there to add weight to choruses, support the rhythm and fill in gaps where the worship leader gets confused. You’re never the centre of attention, but that’s the heart of worship isn’t it? Banish all thoughts of being the next Timmy Jupp and concentrate on building a beautiful sound.

2. Know when to play and when not to

And on that note (pun intended), one of the first skills you learn is when not to play.  There’s a famous video of “Oceans” by Hillsong, where the drummer goes a little crazy on the drum fills, stamping all over the mellow and stripped-back vibe the singer was trying to create. Don’t be that guy. Worship songs often start with just guitar and vocals and you might come in on the repeat of the first verse, or the first chorus, or even the second verse. Obviously take your cue from the worship leader but also try and feel how the song is going – if you’re heading towards a quiet bridge, drop out and come back as it builds up again. It takes a bit of time to get used to when to play and when not to, and you might still get it wrong. But it’s a skill worth practising.

3. Learn to transpose

One of your chief bugbears will be people who only play the guitar. They change key by just slapping on a capo and assume everyone else can do the same. Have you ever put a capo on a keyboard? It just kinda rattles and doesn’t do anything useful. There’s often a “transpose” button that does the job of changing key, but if you don’t have a screen these can be fraught with danger. How many keys did we move up? And how many do we need to move down for the next song? I’m playing a G but it doesn’t sound like a G…what is going on?

A more durable life skill is to get familiar with the different keys and learn to transpose. Most worship songs need the same 5 chords to play, so there aren’t that many chord groups to learn. But just knowing that going up a tone from C gives you a chord group of D/F#m/G/A/Bm instead of C/Em/F/G/Am prepares you for those “I’m sticking a capo on it” moments. And one fret on a guitar = one semitone. But you hope your worship leader would at least mouth “Bb” at you in that way that they do as you’re starting the song. It all helps.

4. Don’t get too enthusiastic

A simple one next. No matter how much you’re building the song, and how much passion you put into your playing, don’t ever play so hard that the keyboard stand collapses. It kills the mood. Trust me on this one.

5. Know how to improvise

Easier said than done, but improvising is a really useful thing to be able to do in worship. If it all takes a bit of a free-singing turn, you can pretty much go nuts (now is the time to prophetically play “Let it Go” over the congregation. You never know – it might really speak to someone). The easiest way is just to play around the notes of the chords – some arpeggios here, a little flowery bit there  – rather than attempting a melody. Practise at home until you get confident, so that when the worship leader breaks a string and looks round at you in panic, you’ll be able to smoothly take over.

6. Chords are your Friend

Related to that point – you’ll find that a lot of worship playing is more about playing chords than picking out the melody of the song. Of course, it’s different if you’re the only musician – then you might want to play the melody and the chords, for a fuller sound (especially if you don’t like singing!). But in a band, there’s a lot going on so it’s best to play chords, with both hands. It might sound boring, but it gives you a good basis for improvising and makes it way easier to play by ear (assuming you can hear yourself…I never can…so I use chord sheets, or scribbled chords on the back of a receipt if the worship leader’s left the music at home. Another advantage of playing chords = your music is the same as a guitarist’s).

7. Mind out for the demo button

Oh, you think it can never happen to you, do you? You think you’ll never lean over to adjust your music and your wrist will lightly brush the button that sends a wave of “Venus” across the congregation? Well, it happened to Martin Smith…

8. Take your cues from the Drummer

I know, I know… I barely even acknowledge the drummer, but he does come in useful sometimes. If you’re unsure of what kinda level you should be playing at, listen to the drums – if they’re using those bamboo stick things, it’s a good bet that you should be pretty soft as well, or not even playing at all (see point 2). If the rhythm is more driving, you can mimic that with the way you play chords. And when they do a massive drum fill that goes on for ten minutes, rebuke them. Publicly, if possible.

9. Learn the hand signals

Tricky one this, as every worship leader has their own hand signals but it’s good to have some kind of understanding about what your worship leader is trying to tell you. An upward motion means “Play Louder”, a circular one means “Keep Going” and them falling to the floor means they’ve been slain in the Spirit, in which case you should both “Play Louder” and “Keep Going” until you see that universal signal from the meeting leader that means “Stop” (it’s a tapping of the watch, in case you aren’t familiar with it). Also learn your own sign language, for informing confused Visuals people what the next song is. “Open the Eyes of my Heart” is particularly satisfying to mime.

 10. Learn to play the guitar

After all these tips, this seems like a bit of a defeatist one. Ah, just give up and learn the guitar…stardom awaits! But that’s not why I say it. More than a basic knowledge of guitar chords means you can play from watching the shape of the worship leader’s hand. You’d be amazed how often that skill comes in useful…


And now you’re set! Go and be free to worship like David did, only with a few more clothes on..

Heres that Martin Smith moment…

101 Things Christians Should Give Up For Lent.

With the start of Lent around the corner, we felt best to wonder what we should give up for lent. Having decided to give up the gym, we realised that all truly Godly people give up multiple things, so we decided to write a list of things that true Christians should give up for lent.

  1. Chocolate.
  2. Beer.
  3. Wine.
  4. Swearing.
  5. Cyder
  6. Biscuits
  7. Vodka
  8. Guitar Playing.
  9. Crisps
  10. Leavened Bread
  11. Sex
  12. Going to the Gym.
  13. Drugs
  14. Mid Air Drumming.
  15. Rock
  16. Roll
  17. Your Hobby.
  18. Watching Non Christian Movies at The Cinema.
  19. Pizza
  20. Pasta
  21. Chinese Food
  22. Junk Food
  23. Non Christian Music
  24. Non Organic Food.
  25. Non Christian TV.
  26. Gossiping. AKA Prayer Small Groups.
  27. Internet Access
  28. TV
  29. Wasting time reading silly lists online.
  30. Going to the Gym.
  31. Going to non independent food stores.
  32. Doing any act that isn’t in the Bible.
  33. Playing computer games from 2001 onwards.
  34. Electricity from non renewable sources.
  35. Processed food.
  36. Easter Eggs.
  37. Driving any motor vehicle. (An electric car / bike is only allowed if you charge from renewable sources)
  38. All shoes, except for sandals.
  39. Your wages.
  40. Listening to non Christian radio.
  41. Talking to anyone who may lead you at all astray.
  42. Dont even think about eating anything like Pancakes during lent. Thats cheating.
  43. Asthma Attacks.
  44. Going to that Chip Shop on the corner, between work, and the train station.
  45. Buy lego figures.
  46. Looking for spelling / grammer issues in The Church Sofa.
  47. Eating non natural / organic foods.
  48. Caring that one of the above is mentioned twice.
  49. Watching Call The Midwife.
  50. Trying to find things to give up.
  51. Reading ridiculous lists that don’t live up to their promise.

Obviously if you manage to give up all the above, you are indeed a Godly person, and possibly living in a cave somewhere.

Well done.