Ten New Ways To Put Off The Preacher.

For those times which you feel compelled to misbehave, we’re proud to present; 10 Ways to put off the preacher / speaker:

  1. They’ve dressed smart! You never see them that smart. Point and laugh before he goes up the front
  2. He’s shaved. Every time he looks at you… Stroke your beard. If you have a beard.
  3. Does he have his phone on silent? Text him… Find out…
  4. Silent. Deadly.  See if it reaches the speaker.
  5. Remember that large phone from Trigger Happy Tv? That.
  6. Wear masks during the sermon. Claim you’re joining #OccupyTheSermon movement.
  7. Every time the speaker looks at you. Wink.
  8. Keep an eye on the football scores, hold up score cards during the service.
  9. Have a child in need of winding, and may possibly spit up? Pass the kid over to the speaker to sort just before the service…forget the cloth…
  10. Preaching from an iPad? Tweet him / her… See what happens
Team Church Sofa are not responsible for anything that may or may not happen as a result of any of the above actions!

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