10 ways to create trouble in church… but being biblical about it!

Imagine you’re sat there in Church, and you’re wondering “Wouldn’t it be funny if a particular situation happened”. Obviously you dont do anything about it, because isn’t it a bit naughty to make trouble in Church? What if there was a biblical basis for the trouble you are creating? If you are in a trouble making mood then check out our following list:

  1. Swap your church bibles for something a bit more Greek.
  2. Non alcoholic communion wine? Swap it for something with a bit more kick!*
  3. Bring take out to every communion service… if anyone complains point out that Jesus had communion after a meal.
  4. Someone being baptized? Throw them into a river.**
  5. Encourage everyone looking for a job / training to go into carpentry.
  6. Having a bring and share meal at Church? Bring some locusts…
  7. Ask the preacher to tell you a story.
  8. Are you preaching? Arrive to church dressed in Whale vomit, see what happens.
  9. Before any church meals, demand the minister washes everyones feet.
  10. Organising the next church lunch? Arrange for everyone to only bring milk, or honey.

*You may want to make sure no one has issues with alcohol in your church first.
** Offer life jackets if they can’t swim.

Obviously the sofa takes no responsibility for anything you do as a result of reading this. Ever.

Any one got other ideas? 

Married. Dad.

Blogger / WordPress / Email List Guy.

Photographer.

Support worker. Short sentences. I write Bio in.

10 Tips to Survive A Meeting

Its a new week. Its getting towards the end of the month. You may have a meeting coming up at church. Yes. Another meeting.

The Church Sofa team have sat through some Church related meetings… and other random meetings as well. Here’s someways to help survive yet another meeting:

Continue reading “10 Tips to Survive A Meeting”

Married. Dad.

Blogger / WordPress / Email List Guy.

Photographer.

Support worker. Short sentences. I write Bio in.