“When asked why there was only one set of footprints in the sand, Jesus replied…”
Welcome to the seventh (SEVENTH!) edition of The Church Sofa Awards.
This is where we celebrate the best and sometimes worse moments of 2016, featured both on this blog and around the internet. Obviously the standard rules apply, no actual awards will be given out or harmed during these proceedings.
The first award is…
Church Notice Board of The Year: Well this interesting bit of advertising seemed popular… Not sure why…
Most useful Church Sofa List: It looks like we helped people learn how to prepare for when the Vicar visits with our “Vicar coming to visit” checklist.
The Greatest Regret from 2016: Last year I wrote, “Sofa does try and educate people about Church and Churchy things through the form of lists. This years most popular list seems to be A Reminder of What Is Not in The Bible. I still sometimes ponder writing more about what isn’t in the Bible….” I still have the same ponder, and I’ve still done nothing about it. Sad how quick a year can pass isn’t it?
The Church Toilet of The Year:
Silly Song of The Year:
Anyone else fancy a pizza?
Hero of The World.*
He may not be the hero we need.
But we really feel K2SO from Star Wars – Rogue One, is the hero 2016 deserves.
I would explain why… but *shhh* spoilers…
*This last award may not be serious… Actually none of them are really serious…
What do you reckon? Are then any awards which we should have included??
Any awards that should have been different?
Any thing that we’ve missed out?
In case you’ve not heard, Rogue One: A Star Wars Story is now released. Rogue One, while not one of “the prequels” is set soon before the original Star Wars, and is a good fun watch for fans of the first Star Wars movies, and people who want to start watching them. (But you will so miss the fan service that takes place)
As there is a new Star Wars film, it feels right to continue the series looking at What The Church Can Learn from Star Wars. (Please see here for the look at the original trilogy, or here for Star Wars: The Force Awakens.)
Obviously, there be spoilers for the new Star Wars movie ahead. Not massive spoilers – and probably more like hints… but they are still spoilers! If you care about spoilers, please go and watch the new movie first, then come back!
Please scroll past Darth Spoiler Vader to read What the Church can learn from Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.
- Don’t believe everything you hear. That internet rumour about anti-Donald Trump stuff in Star Wars, if its true, I didn’t see it.
- Don’t Judge A Druid On Your First Impressions
- Do NOT Discount The Strong Believer. They might be pretty handy in a fight.
- Parents. Talk To Your Kids! They might help blow up a Death Star one day.
- Be Ready To Change Your Opinion Of Someone. They might turn out to be handy with a blaster one day.
- That Person Who Keeps Muttering About The Force? Turns out they might be able to hear really well…
- Sometimes, you have to jump. How you’d make it makes very little sense, but you might still need to jump.
- Youth Pastor starting to have ambition? Blow up the planet he’s on.
- Watch out for old friends.
- Sometimes, life sucks. This is not a bright easy movie. It’s dark, and has a smell of death. You could say its a very 2016 movie.
- This is Not The End. You could almost say there is hope.
Any more you could add?
As always. Any problems with these, please let Disney know.
What if Darth spent Star Wars quoting the Bible?
(includes a little amount of NSFW – or kids language)
I guess it could be worse, it could have been Jar Jar Binks…
I’ve just taken a quick straw poll*, and I’ve found that the most well known scene in the gospels in The Last Supper. (Obviously after the crucifixion, and anything to do with Christmas).
I would guess it fair to say that one reason why the scene is so well known is due to The Last Supper painting:
I figured it would be interesting to look at the other not so famous looks at The Last Supper… (Be warned, one of them is a little naughty, not very naughty, but a little naughty)
The Ordering A Very Large Table Last Supper.
The Traitors Last Supper
The Selfie Last Supper
The Doctors Last Supper
(How long is that scarf?)
The Jedis’ Last Supper
Which is your favourite last supper?
*A straw poll of lego men… but hey…
It was one of those questions that I wasn’t sure how to answer: “How was it?”. The “it” in question was a funeral. My mind flashed through a few different answers before, saying something deep and meaningful like, “errrr…. it was alright”. This got me thinking, how do you describe how good a funeral is? Is there a rating system for funerals?
Turns out, having a guide for rating a funeral is weird.
Therefore, please let me introduce the Church Sofa Guide to Rating a Funeral.
1 / 10: Lazarus
2 / 10: Its a wet wet day. The coffin is made from cardboard…
3 / 10: Someone slipped on the graveside. Joined the deceased underground.
4 / 10: The previously mentioned soaking wet coffin gets dropped…
5 / 10: Someone forgets to check the “deceased” for signs of fireworks in their pockets… Just before a cremation…
6 / 10: A nice little funeral, with a few nice people, with a nice vicar, leading a nice service, on a nice day, in a nice town…
7 / 10: A State Funeral.
8 / 10: One of those funerals with everyone you know there, INCLUDING, the people that matter.
9 / 10: Something combining a state funeral, with everyone you know there, INCLUDING, the people that matter – AND you have a heck of party afterwards!
10 / 10: Darth Vaders funeral.
Any other suggestions?
A while ago, I asked a serious question, “what can the Church learn from Star Wars?” As you may have noticed, there is a new Star Wars movie out. To celebrate here is our list of What the Church can learn from Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
Obviously, there be spoilers for the new Star Wars movie ahead. If you care about spoilers, please go and watch the new movie first, then come back!
Please scroll past Darth Vader to read What the Church can learn from Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
Please bear in mind that these are lessons from Star Wars. Any problem with the content of these lessons? Take it up with The Force…
Be Ready to Accept Help From Unusual Places
Have a Mentor in Church…
After all its important to have someone to look up to…
Be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.
Don’t run away from a family fight.
The family can be useful in a fight.
Little friends are also good.
I want a BB-8 in my life!
Be ready to accept who’s under the mask.
I can accept the guy… but I cant remember this scene..?
Build Bridges, just don’t try and resolve fights on a bridge.
There were just too many spoilers for the internet to be able to handle a decent picture of this one…
Just because someone doesn’t seem to be paying attention, doesn’t mean they are not paying attention!
They might happen to wake up at the right time to help…
Any more that you can think of?
Sometimes they get blurred…