Alternative Activities During A Christian Festival

Christian festivals are great. Loads of stuff happening, from great speakers, and great people, to great bands, and tolerable food.

Loads of stuff happening, all the time. But what if you’re someone whose attention gets distracted at the best of times.

What if you find yourself wanting something a little different to do?* Here are ten ideas of alternative activities that can be done at a Christian festival.

  1. Say “Amen” with every point that the speaker makes. Get gradually louder as the talk progresses. Encourage others around you to join. See how loud you can all get. **
  2. If attending any Soul Survivor festival, dress like your attending a funeral. All week. And everytime some says “Soul Survivor”, you whisper”Long may it Rest in Peace”.
  3. Are you attending Creation Fest? Set up a stall saying, “Cream First. Change my mind”
  4. Facebook friend EVERYONE YOU MEET!!! Show you’re an awesome Christian by tagging them in inspirational Bible verse images.
    Once an hour.
    Every hour.
  5. See anyone eating bread? Offer them a glass of red wine. So they can eat like Jesus ate.***
  6. Start a rumour that the rumour about Delirious having a reunion show at the festival is simply a rumour. See what happens.
  7. If stuck in a heatwave. Play “Rain Down” really loudly, on an old guitar. Explain that you’re praying for the rain to come.
  8. See anyone drinking wine? Ask if you can share their communion.
  9. Live stream your whole festival experience on Facebook Live. ALL of it. Let me know what happens.
  10. Apologise for the late night guitar playing, by serving really strong decaff coffee every morning to the tents around you. Serve proper stuff in the evenings.

Any more you think that should be added?

* Please be careful. The Church Sofa takes no responsibility if you end up in Christian festival jail… or actual jail… or where ever…
**Be careful. This may lead to accidental reports of Revival breaking out. Due to you messing around.
On second thoughts. That could be quite funny.
*** MIght get expensive.

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Soul Survivor. Good Bye.

Soul-Survivor-Closing

Mike Pilavachi from Soul Survivor, has announced, the Soul Survivor Festivals are to close.

There’s a text version of the above found at the Soul Survivor website, which includes a snippet which I’m sure I remember from my Soul Survivor Days. (20 – ish years ago)

“we know that God said, ‘I will build my church’ – he never said, ‘I will build my Soul Survivor’. Our passion has always been to support the local church where faith is lived out as family week in and week out, not to create our own movement.”

I can’t help but think that closing 5 (I think), festivals really shows this.

There was a temptation to say something rude / sarcastic / silly…something a bit “Church Sofa” about all this.

I can’t.

For all the Live CDs, the festivals, books, Delirious / Tree / Sarah Mason gigs.

For that silly Bible365 thing we did on The Sofa.

For the interestingly quiet queues for the shower (during the alter calls).

I guess.

Thank you.

(In case you need something more silly to read, can I suggested “Spreading Joy At A Christian Festival“, and the related posts – they are possibly inspired in some way by Soul Survivor. Possibly.)

 

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What Christians Do On Holiday?

Sofa has finally got round to booking some holiday. Now we dont have much booked in, so I consulted a few local church people for ideas of what a Christian should do on holiday.

Here’s a few ideas of what a Christian should do on holiday.

Go and look at some old churches.

Because they are kinda pretty….

Sit somewhere nice and enjoy the view.

Interrupt the  evening of those around you, by asking if they know and love Jesus. Keep talking until they do.

Try Out Your Local Christian Festival.

Could try evangelizing there?

Read your Bible.

Go out somewhere interesting*, and read your bible somewhere a little interesting. Tweet me a picture or something afterwards.

Drink Water. Plenty of Water.

 

Any other suggestions?

*interesting – NOT stupid. I DO NOT WANT PEOPLE TO FALL OF A CLIFF OR DROWN OR ANYTHING!!!

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Being Bored At A Christian Festival

Being Bored at a Christian Festival

We’ve all been there. You know everyone is having fun, but you cant help but feel a little bored.
For some reason you can’t find anything to occupy your brain with.
Well, when you’re away from home, this can be rubbish. Therefore The Church Sofa has put together this little wheel spinner, to help you decide what to do, if you’re bored at a Christian Festival.

Any you would add?

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Spreading Joy at A Christian Festival

Sofa may receive some some money (not much) if you click on some of the links below…

Over the next month and a bit there will be loads of Christian Festivals all around England, which will attract many Christians from many different Churches from all over the place. With festivals such as Momentum, New Wine, Soul Survivor, Keswick, Greenbelt. and Creation Fest, there are plenty to choose from.

In an attempt to get into the Festival spirit, Sofa decided to write the annual Church Sofa list of the best ways to create trouble at a Christian Festival ask around for ways to spread some “Joy” at these events…

  1. Have a supply of sweets to give out to people.
  2. Be servant hearted. Serve warm milky hot chocolate each night of the festival to the tents around you. On the last night, mix it up with espresso.
  3. Walk up to any musicians / famous Christian singer types and ask if they are U2.
  4. Print a T-Shirt saying “Its not like it used to be around here”.
  5. Walk around with an open wifi hotspot in your pocket. Lock it down so people can only access another festival website.
  6. Lead late night worship sessions. Ensure the worship is honest, by not tuning your guitar… not singing in tune… Also ensure that God can hear by singing loudly.
  7. Ask people if they’ve heard of the Delirious reunion tour, and their “Holy Troublemakers” single*?
  8. Ask everyone for their signature, explain they are all famous in Gods eyes. (Don’t ask famous Christians for their autograph)
  9. Tweet a photo of random peoples signatures to @thechurchsofa. Help me feel included in with the fun.
  10. Be servant hearted. Serve coffee each morning of the festival. Ensure it’s decaf on the last morning.

For more ideas, please check out last years list, Managing Mischief At A Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

*i may have made this up, but there is a song on Stu G’s “The Beatitudes Project” called Holy Troublemakers, which could be mistaken for a reunion.

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Managing Mischief At A Christian Festival

Over the next month and a half there will be various Christian Festivals all around England, that will attract many Christians from all different Churches over the place. With festivals such as Momentum, New Wine, Soul Survivor, Keswick, Greenbelt. and Creation Fest, there are plenty to choose from.

As its the Summer Christian Festival Season, it is also time for the annual Church Sofa list of the best ways to create trouble at a Christian Festival… Consider this list in case you get bored or something…

  1. Spend the week “springing” around the festival. When questioned explain that you thought you were at Spring Harvest. (You may only want to actually do this at Spring Harvest*)
  2. Bring supplies of spare wellies** to sell. If its a hot sunny week, spray water over the grounds early in the morning in an attempt to convince people the weather is about to turn nasty.
  3. Greet people you meet with a Holy Kiss.
  4. Set up a stall offering to wash peoples feet. Once done charge them a tenner. If they say no, chase after them with the cheesey feet water.
  5. Run around naked, when challenged explain you are trying to recreate the world before The Fall.
  6. If you’re at Soul Survivor in Somerset, walk around planting “Goodbye” cards into the ground.
  7. “Borrow” a radio from one of the stewards. Begin whispering down the radio whenever they start to look bored. Topic of whispering is up to you.
  8. Make notes about how much more biblical your Christian Festival is compared to others!
  9. Open a stand offering to exchange people’s old wine for “New wine”. Run away before people realise that the “New wine”, is in fact, Ribena.
  10. Bring a megaphone to the festival with you. Early during the first morning, scream into the megaphone, then hide it quickly. When people rush to your tent to ask whats wrong, apologise and explain you just had a nightmare. Explain its been a problem since your tent was flooded one year at a previous Christian Festival. Be warned, you may end up with severe Prayer Ministry if you do this.

Any that you would like to add?

For more ideas, please check out last years list, 10 Ways To Manage Mischief At A Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

*As if you do this anywhere else, people may look at you strangely
** I may have checked the spelling of that a few times.

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10 Ways To Manage Mischief At A Christian Festival

10 Ways To Manage Mischief At A Christian Festival

Well with New Wine, Soul Survivor, and Keswick currently taking place, its fair to say we are well into the Summer Christian Festival season. With Festivals like Greenbelt, Momentum, and Creation Fest, there are still plenty to choose from.

As its the Summer Christian Festival Season, it is also time for the annual Church Sofa list of the best ways to create trouble at a Christian Festival… Consider this list in case you get bored or something…

  1. Is it raining? Throw mud on strangers eyes. Explain you’re curing their spiritual blindness.
  2. Arrange for the portable showers to be moved around the site. Take advantage of confusing everyone, by having no queue for your shower.
  3. Walk around the camp site with a sign offering free hugs. Run away from anyone who comes anywhere near you.
  4. Throw water on to people. Shout that its Holy Water – check if your victim if the water is burning.
  5. Late night choir practice.
  6. Walk around the camp site offering a free tent to anyone who has had problems with their tent in the rain. Dont tell people its just one tent, that is shared between anyone who takes you up on your offer. Obviously this should be a two person tent.
  7. Is your festival at a Holiday Camp like Butlins? Make the most of the worship time to sneak to the gambling machines without the guilt of being seen…. If on a camp site, get yourself to the showers.
  8. Walk around with a huge sign offering to judge people for free. I’m curious to see what will happen.
  9. Is the worship leader encouraging you to lift your hands in the air? Sit down instead.
  10. Start a rumor that The World Wide Message Tribe aren’t really coming back together.
  11. Campers near you have bar-b-qs, and other cooking equipment? “Borrow” any and all fire lighting equipment, and then challenge them to pray for fire from heaven.

Any that you would like to add?

For more ideas, please check out last years list, How to misbehave at a Christian Festival.

Disclaimer: Do any of these at your own risk, the Sofa takes no responsibility for any trouble that happens to you if you do this, but if you do end up in Christian Festival Jail, please let us know what that’s like.

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The Church Sofa 5th Birthday Self – Indulgent List of Stuff

20131116-231203.jpgIts been 5 years! 5 years since The Church Sofa had its first blog post. I’m not sure what this really means, but I feel we’re ready to go to first school now… Does that mean that Sofa is growing up?

I’ll ponder that for a while, in the mean time, I’ll leave you with the Annual Self – Indulgent List of Stuff… in other words a list of our most popular posts /pages from the last 5 years:

  1. Guide to Raising Hands in Church.
  2. The Church Sofa Guide to Church.
  3. Introducing “God Baby”.
  4. Christian Chat Up Lines.
  5. Ten Christian Insults to Consider
  6. Ten Ways to Misbehave at A Christian Festival.
  7. Do you need a spare vicar?
  8. Things Jesus Never Said.
  9. What Christian Denomination Should You Be Part Of?
  10. How kids disrupt Church Services (A Guide Through The Ages)

Thank you for your support over the last 5 years. I’m going to go and practice behaving like a 5 year old…

Anything you’d want to see more of over the next 5 years?

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What price is you and your families spiritual growth?

The other day, I overheard a conversation about Christian festivals in the UK, and how much it costs to go to one in particular. In defence, someone asked the question: “What price is you and your families spiritual growth?

I figured I should do some research to find out, at what price does spiritual growth indeed cost?* (Based on 2 adults and a toddler)

What is the Price of Spiritual Growth?

Now this is all a little approximate, as some of the above festivals do offer cheaper ways to get tickets. Others – particularly towards the more pricey end of the spectrum do also offer a number of more expensive options as well.

I’ve not factored in other costs involved like petrol, food, emotional, alcohol, etc… But all the above does include accommodation for the duration of the festival. 

Its also worth noting that lower cost doesn’t equal lack of “big names”.

Anyone out there fancy taking a stab at what we can learn from all this?

*This is obviously all presuming that spiritual growth does indeed only happen at Christian Festivals.

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