Have you heard the thing about the american Attorney General Jess Sessions, and his attempt at using the Bible to justify current practice of separating immigrant parents and children.
Wondering what Jess Sessions actually said?
Here it is… or at least a only slightly edited version of it…
I’m sure there are a number of other Bible verses that can be picked out the air for something like this. What other verses could he have said?
Isn’t using the Bible to encourage people to not question the law a little… I don’t know… dodgy?
They say that “cleanliness is next to godliness”, I’m not sure “they” are, and I’m not sure if “they” are right. But one time, while cleaning up for Housegroup, I did wonder. Are there “Christian ways to keep a house clean”? (Its the way my mind seems to work)
After consulting some particularly godly people, I gathered the following tops to keep a tidy Christian house.
- Invite housegroup to meet at your place… EVERY WEEK!!
- Preach on servanthood at Church. Encourage people to put that into action by cleaning up your place.
- Do not store up ANY treasures. Live a minimal life. Throw out EVERYTHING apart from your bible.
- Dont drink things like Tea that needs things like Tea Bags, as that creates needless waste… drink red wine… just like Jesus.
- Dont buy any Christian books. Convince your church to get it for the church book lending library, and borrow it from there instead.
- Only have one Bible. (Possibly the King James Version)
- Throw out your DVDs / Blurays… Sign up to Pureflix.com instead.
- Avoid beer bottles being built up. Drink only red wine. (Better if you buy red wine in those big boxes)
- You pray for the spirit of peace to come over your house everyday. Just hope that no one looks in the garden.
- Treat your house like Holy Ground… TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES!!!
How do you keep your house tidy?
Long time readers of The Sofa will know of my daughter, “Little Sofa”. I don’t mention her often as this place is often about silly church things… not little person things.
Now, if you don’t have kids yourself, they seem to hate the concept of going to relax in a bed and gently going to sleep for the night. (It’s like they believe that they’ll miss out on all the fun if they sleep.)
Normally kids employ tactics to stay up like, running, dancing, needing a wee, and going to the toilet.
Lately I’ve noticed that Little Sofa occasionally tries a different technique to avoid going to sleep… She starts talking about church things… and well I guess we’re never sure how much we should tell her to go to sleep if she’s asking questions about Jesus?
Anyway here’s a collection of Christian style techniques she has employed to stay awake. (Some of which I may have made up):
- Opens up and explains what they did at Sunday school / holiday club.
- Asks questions about diversity within the human race, and why we’re created differently.
- Asks about the people out in the lions den.
- “Did Jesus go to school?”
- Test parents about deep theological matters.
- Starts writing practice. Writing Bible verses.
- Insists on a really long prayer.
- Sings a long forgotten song from Holiday Club, really nicely, with cute dialed up to 12.
- “How does God know our name?”
- Complains about a dream during which they are chased by a really big blue book.
Any more you can offer?