For those times which you feel compelled to misbehave, we’re proud to present; 10 Ways to put off the preacher / speaker:
- They’ve dressed smart! You never see them that smart. Point and laugh before he goes up the front
- He’s shaved. Every time he looks at you… Stroke your beard. If you have a beard.
- Does he have his phone on silent? Text him… Find out…
- Silent. Deadly. See if it reaches the speaker.
- Remember that large phone from Trigger Happy Tv? That.
- Wear masks during the sermon. Claim you’re joining #OccupyTheSermon movement.
- Every time the speaker looks at you. Wink.
- Keep an eye on the football scores, hold up score cards during the service.
- Have a child in need of winding, and may possibly spit up? Pass the kid over to the speaker to sort just before the service…forget the cloth…
- Preaching from an iPad? Tweet him / her… See what happens
Team Church Sofa are not responsible for anything that may or may not happen as a result of any of the above actions!












I’m glad you posted this today, and NOT last Saturday. Would’ve made me ten times more nervous before I preached last Sunday